Chey’s Lounge

Omg guys. I fucking hit a car pulling out of my driveway. You must allow me another day of a short post for I am SAD. By someone, I mean a parked car. I rely too much on the beep beep beep! And it BETRAYED ME!!! I’m on my third beer of the night. I am not gonna write too much unless inspiration strikes. They called the cops bc I like obviously found the car’s owner the cop tried to make me feel better about it. I don’t feel great. It isn’t like that big of a deal. And ugh my car is fine. I wish it was the other fricken way around! I guess there’s a lesson there. Hit em first, bitch! 

Have I ever told you about the time a man threw a half gallon of Tropicana orange juice at my head on the streets of Manhattan (I know I haven’t)? Well, here’s how it went down. I was with someone else and they were walking fast, so I was trying to catch up. I was walking fast and ended up walking into a tall, skinny guy who was built like a brick wall. He was so fucking mad I walked into him. He threw his juice at me (prob only like half full). I turned the fuck around and assessed the surroundings. There was a doorman for a building right to my left who was obviously paying attention. The brick wall told me to never fucking walk into him again. I was like okay?? Like we’re in Manhattan, sir? I don’t think I will ever be seeing you again. He definitely called me a bitch. I don’t remember what else. What I do remember is looking at him, looking at the security guard, looking back at him, and yelling, “FUCK YOU CUNT” and then he just looked at me and I walked away. He said nothing else. I’ve yet to see him again. I highly doubt we’d recognize each other at all!! I’m gonna say something very controversial. I lowkey almost feel like he was begging me to hurl a racial slur at him to allow him carte blanche to beat the shit out of me. Unluckily for him, he wasn’t getting that shit outta me. Like, no one would, but considering he was build like a brick wall and already proven to be a looser cannon than I.. like literally, let’s be sooo real, do I look stupid?? Maybe, honestly, perhaps some men could find that more offensive, I just couldn’t say at all either way. I feel like he was shocked. I feel like there’s a chance I wouldn’t have said anything if the doorman wasn’t there. All I know is he was kinda a cunt. Also, a LOT of people, especially older, do not like that word at all. I fucking love it. And you know what? I’m fucking sad tonight, so I cursed my little heart out without remorse. Because I’m just a stupid little bitch and I am sad that I am an idiot. I will reply to comments soon… I wish I were retired. I will enjoy my lone Sunday of the week tomorrow, hopefully. I’ll do my best. I never finished that 3rd beer yet. Not spellchecking once again, btw. I’m a little bit sorry about it. I hope your day was better than mine!