Chey’s Lounge

Very few people have the foresight required to put every necessary rule in place. So that means many rules are the result of some sort of craziness or stupidity. I felt okay yesterday, but I feel kind of off today. Need to adjust my mindset and just try to feel thankful. There are people whose lives have changed in ways they never could’ve imagined moments before it happened. I’m trying to not be in the mood to start a fight. Poke a bear. Cause some commotion. I’m currently not doing what I should be doing. This sentence can apply in many ways, but it doesn’t apply to everything. Idek what I really should be doing. I just hate the way life is influenced by outside forces. I hate the way some people are able to manipulate them. I hate that I don’t usually feel confident enough to. I hate that sometimes I just do so out of anger and people don’t take me seriously and then once the anger subsides I’m just angry and embarrassed. Maybe I’m just too insane and my brain is expending all of my energy on stupid stuff. I can’t believe there are people who start stuff from scratch and build it into something big. I can’t even buy people Christmas presents. I guess that’s what this blog is partially for, to force me to do something with no obvious reward. I will say, advertising the Melania Trump, The Hat Man post was a really fun time LOL. Idek what’s fun to me exactly. I guess I like to go for walks when it’s warm, but I don’t really love it when it’s cold. I guess I just need to dress more appropriately for the weather. Idk though, the air just be cold sometimes. At least to me. 

Someone asked what was up with me today and like idk. I’m just trying my best and some days my best isn’t even good I guess? I just get mad about a lot of things and it distracts me. I’ve been trying not to. I feel like there’s just years of uncertainty ahead and it’s exhausting. I need to not think about it. I need to not listen to negativity all the time. I need to learn to not let the outside noise get to me. It feels impossible at a certain point. It’s just so crazy how there are people making minimum wage and others making soooo much and we all just live together somewhat peacefully? Is that not crazy to people? How have we tamed the anarchic nature of people using society? Somehow, obviously! I feel like that could be a huge post itself… how did we get here exactly?